Read this Post Please?

Okay, so sometimes my mind wanders. Mainly at work, as I stated last post. I am a cabinet finisher, I do a lot lot of sanding, staining and spray booth work, on my own for the most part, for the entire workday. So stuff has lots of time to bounce around in my head, and now I can put it out there for everyone to ponder.

Please explain the word please...

I have a hard time speaking up and asking for things. Yesterday on two occasions I had to ask for favors. I wanted a day off in a few weeks time, I wanted a piece of a coworkers gum. So I asked for these things, and found that the word please feels awkward on my tongue. Of course I've been properly brought up with manners and such, but as an adult I find that using please takes an odd forms. It's tacked onto a command or order given to you to try to make it sound like a polite request, but really they expect you to do it anyway. As in "Can you pass the ketchup please?" No one is going to deny you ketchup, this isn't a question at all. Even worse is "please pass the ketchup", clearly a command disguised as politeness because of that one word. You're not fooling me please, you're making me do something that doesn't necessarily please me at all. Why not simply ask the question "could you pass the ketchup?" and let a person decide for themselves if following through with the request will please them or not. Or ask what you really mean, "it would please me greatly if you could pass the ketchup". There, so much less commanding, maybe a bit formal, but it pleases me more that you just said what you meant and were done with it. I'm not offended at all that you left off the polite word when you asked.

Then there is the begging please. "May I have a piece of gum, please?". Ugh, the worst kind of please. It makes you feel five again. Do you tack it on on the front to try to make it sound better, "Please may I have some gum?". No, that maybe makes it worse. I am an adult, I can buy my own gum, but your gum is sitting right there... and if you did say no it wouldn't be the end of the world. Yes it will please me, but I understand if maybe you need that gum for later. It's not the end of the world either way you answer, but maybe by being polite and giving you the sad puppy dog stare I'll get what I want? It definitely works for my friend's daughter. When she tacks a "pweese" on there you know she's getting whatever she wants from Auntie Kristina. Somehow, though when Auntie Kristina uses it, it makes her feel ridiculous.

I'm not against manners at all, in fact I love a good "thank you". I'll throw thank you's out all day. I just am bothered by please right now and need to stop over thinking it I guess. Whether we're pleasing the asker or the askee, whether it should be at the front or the end of the question, whether it's really needed at all, these questions don't really matter. It's what we all say, if you don't then you are clearly a barbarian, or possibly American. I just had time to think about it, and well there you go.

Thank you for reading, it was my pleasure to write it.

Oh, and by the way, I got my day off AND my piece of gum. Score!